Do you ever feel like a drunken trip through the mods eerily resembles the maze at the end of "The Shining" or "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire"? To help those poor unfortunate souls, we shall post a map of this endearing neighborhood and give cheat codes of how to get past the obstacles that block us college students from a night of drunken debauchery.
There may be a subliminal message hidden in the pattern of mods to unlock the national treasure buried by Father Leahy in the days of yore
After passing the BCPD and answering the riddle "how many drinks have you had tonight?" unleash your wand to banish the crowds of drunk kids you know but did not wish to see on this particular evening.
You must then decide whether the secret entrance to the Modular lies at the front door or the glass sliding door in back. Do you wish to knock and ring until your knuckles no longer bear it? Or do you wish to be that person that peers in creepily through the glass only to realize that there are only 8 people in the common room. The choice is yours, but at the end of the evening, these tips will hopefully make you the Tri-Solo-cup winner!
- A Tale of Two Titties
- It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of drudgery, it was the age of ruthlessness, it was the era of single lady clowns, it was the era of sexy time, there were seasons of Kardashians , seasons of Teen Mom, it was the spring of killer tans, it was the winter of vitamin D deficiency, we had All- American before us, we had dead fucking last before us, we were all going directly to Heaven, some were going directly the other way, this period is unlike any before it, even the crankiest grandmas and emo-est teens, could agree, for good or for evil, this is the pinnacle, it all goes down from here.