After Mel's tubulant, Racist, sexist, and anti-Semitic antics the past couple of years, I firmly believe that he needs a Mickey Rourke or better yet--Robert Downey Jr. style comeback. Yes, he is a past Oscar winner for Braveheart and garnered a holier-than-thou reputation for the Passion of the Christ, but he is going to undo his DUI charges and win back his real life wife after this next masterpiece comes out.
Ex child prostitute Jodie Foster has had her share of Fucked up movie roles (Taxi Driver and Silence of the Lambs) so she is well suited to act alongside Lucifer himself, Mel Gibson. Though playing a mentally disturbed has-been may seem like a stretch for Mel, I am thoroughly convinced that he is mature enough for this role.
In The Beaver, a depressed toy company CEO finds an outlet for his emotions with a dingy beaver hand puppet found in a dumpster. Mel Gibson and a hand puppet with a Cockney accent! Great success. Watch the trailer to comprehend the complexities of this film fully.
I'm calling it right now: this movie will be nominated for SOME Oscar (granted it is released in time)
Written by Dildo Daggins
- A Tale of Two Titties
- It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of drudgery, it was the age of ruthlessness, it was the era of single lady clowns, it was the era of sexy time, there were seasons of Kardashians , seasons of Teen Mom, it was the spring of killer tans, it was the winter of vitamin D deficiency, we had All- American before us, we had dead fucking last before us, we were all going directly to Heaven, some were going directly the other way, this period is unlike any before it, even the crankiest grandmas and emo-est teens, could agree, for good or for evil, this is the pinnacle, it all goes down from here.